


Oh, father time, you and me and holiday wine

by yasminkhxns



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Christmas fic, F/F, Family, Family Fluff, Fluff, Light Angst, but she's happy in the end becasue it's what she deserves, the doctor just being a little bit sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:48:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21936229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yasminkhxns/pseuds/yasminkhxns
Summary: Nearing Christmastime, the Doctor goes and visits some past companions in search of answers for her own feelings.
Relationships: (briefly) - Relationship, The Doctor/Yasmin Khan, Thirteenth Doctor/River Song, Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan
Comments: 20
Kudos: 116





	Oh, father time, you and me and holiday wine

**Author's Note:**

> ITS CHRIMMAS 
> 
> merry christmas y'all!! i almost didn't get this finished in time lmao but think of this fic as a present and a thank you to everyone who has supported me throughout this hiatus leaving kudos and comments, they mean the world to me <3 
> 
> thank you @timelxdy for betaing!!

The Doctor stood outside the pub, wind blowing gently through strands of blonde hair, her scarf bunched around her neck to fight off the cold. She didn’t need to go inside, there was no reason to _—_ she could see exactly what she needed to from outside. A swish of ginger locks, a recognisable laugh, and a Christmas jumper and two sets of antlers on a white haired head. 

As she watched, she saw the old man stand, his hand pointing toward the pub door as he started to step toward it, and the Doctor panicked. She had two options, one was to leave _—_ step back into her TARDIS and fly away, or stay. She was different now, three lives different, surely he wouldn’t recognise her. The old man pushed open the pub door, walking in her direction. She was just going to let him go, let him walk past, smile politely if he looked her way, nothing more… except–

“Love the antlers.” the Doctor blurted out, inwardly cursing herself for being unable to let the old man go. 

He turned, a kind smile on his face, one that was heartbreakingly memorable. “Oh, well thank you very much, my daughter hates them. She thinks I get far too Christmassy every year.” 

“You can never be too Christmassy.” the Doctor smiled back.

“Absolutely! They’re even starting to bring my granddaughter around to getting into more of the Christmas spirit.”

The Doctor’s smile faltered briefly, though she covered the slight drop too quickly for the old man to notice. “Sounds brilliant.”

“Yeah, it’s nice to see her happy again. Though…” the old man trailed off, and the Doctor’s hearts cracked, knowing all too well why he spoke of his granddaughter in such a way. “Anyway, better get back, got some last minute present wrapping to do. Merry Christmas!” he went to walk away before pausing. “Oh, sorry love, I never caught your name, mine’s Wilf.”

“Oh…” the Doctor shook her head, “you don’t need my name, names aren’t important, who needs names anyway,” she shuffled nervously, Wilf’s face morphing into confusion at her ramble.

“Don’t be so daft, of course names are important. I’ve known some very special people with very special names in my time.” he spoke wistfully.

“I bet you have.” the Doctor replied, a sad lull to her tone.

“So are you gonna tell me your name?” 

Wilf was so kind, to her past self, and right now, to her current self, that she couldn’t stop herself even if she tried. “The Doctor.”

Wilf froze, emotions twisting and changing behind his eyes, his jaw falling slack as they locked eyes. “The… but… you’re…”

“A woman?” 

Wilf nodded.

“Yeah, well, regeneration _—_ it’s a bit of a lottery. But it’s me Wilf,” she spoke gently, a hand falling to his shoulder, “I promise.” she pulled out her sonic, pressing the button and letting a quick whir sound before putting it back. 

Wilf stammered for a moment before finally getting a sentence out. “Flippin’ heck. I never thought I’d see you again. What’s brought you here? Is it aliens? Do you need my help?” he said eagerly.

“Nope. No aliens. Just _—_ looking back on old family.” the Doctor uttered, gaze briefly flicking back inside the pub where Donna threw her head back in laughter. 

“It’s been a long time, but I still catch her you know _—_ staring off into nothing like she’s trying to remember something she doesn’t know. Breaks my heart every time.” Wilf smiled sadly.

“I know, I’m sorry Wilf. I’ll always be sorry that she can’t remember me, can’t remember anything.” 

“When we last saw each other,” Wilf started, voice shaking, “how much longer did that  _ you  _ last after that?”

“Not long.” the Doctor sniffed, gaze dropping, “Probably a few hours.” 

Wilf nodded with a concerned frown, “And you changed into this body?”

The Doctor chuckled, though it lacked humour. “No. Two more me’s before this one. When I say it’s been a while Wilf, I mean it.” 

“How long?”

Wilf–”

“How long, Doctor?” Wilf pressed, “I can see it in your eyes, that you’re old.”

“Far older than I should be.” the Doctor said with a small smile.

“Are you travelling alone?”

The Doctor’s face lit up at the thought of her new family. “Nah, travelling alone isn’t good for me, I’m old enough to know that now. I’ve got my fam.”

“And they look after you?”

“They do. And I look after them.” she replied with a genuine smile and a nod. 

“Good.” Wilf sighed then, briefly glancing inside at Donna, then back to the Doctor who was already looking at him in warning.

“Wilf–”

“Can’t you just come say hi?” he asked. “You’re different now, she won’t know you, it won’t matter,  _ surely. _ ”

“Wilf, I can’t.” the Doctor uttered, her voice breaking.

Wilf’s eyes glistened with unshed tears under the streetlight, lip trembling along with his voice. “But you’re completely different now, you’re a woman, you were man, she won’t know–”

“I  _ can’t  _ risk it Wilf, I’m sorry. I’m not putting her life in danger for my own self indulgence. She’s my best friend, I can’t do that to her. Do you understand?” the Doctor stated, her voice wobbling at the mention of Donna, thoughts flashing back to old memories.

A tear slipped from Wilf’s eyes, the old man quickly wiping it away with a glove clad hand. “I understand, I’m… I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t apologise Wilf, I get why you want me to, I just…”

“You can’t.” he resided.

“Yeah.”

They stood in silence for a few moments, the Doctor awkwardly shoving her hands in her pockets until she huffed. “Well, I um… I suppose I better you know _—_ go.” 

“Right, course. You look after yourself, Doctor.”

“And you, Wilf. And Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, Doctor. Maybe I’ll see you again one day?”

“Maybe you will.” she said with enthused optimism. 

She spun on her heel to walk away, taking one step before turning back, “Oh, and Wilf?”

“Yes?” he said hopefully.

“I’d still be proud, you know?” the Doctor grinned.

“Eh?”

“After all this time, I’d still be proud _—_ if you were my dad.” the Doctor smiled, features full of earnest, her eyes glossy with her own tears, Wilf unable to hold his back. 

“And you’re still daft.” he replied with a watery laugh.

* * *

The Doctor was still in London, another time, another place, though just a little bit after Christmas. January 1st to be exact, the year 2005. She knew she probably shouldn’t be here, crossing over her timelines like this, but he was too distracted by a different blonde to ever notice she was there _—_ looking down from the roof of a building. The Doctor made her way to the edge, hearing it unfold before she could see it.

“You alright mate?” the Doctor’s hearts jumped at the sound of such a distinct voice, her own but not her own having already replied. 

“Too much to drink?”

“Something like that.”

The Doctor sat down on the edge then, watching as the scene unfolded before her, exactly how she remembered it. Rose wrapped up warm as snow fell down gently, catching in her scarf, dotting on her beanie, smile shining like it always did. 

“Maybe it’s time you went home.”

“Yeah.”

The Doctor didn’t really understand why she was here, feeling more melancholic than usual, she supposed. Looking back on her old families while her new one waited for her. Family. They really were her family _—_ Ryan, Graham… Yaz. Though she continually pondered on whether she wanted Yaz to be  _ just  _ family, especially when her concentration fell back to the event happening in front of her.

“Blimey, how much have you had? 2005, January the first.”

The Doctor remembered it all like it was yesterday, could never possibly forget the last time she saw Rose Tyler with those eyes. She realised now, that she could see some of Yaz in Rose, and vice versa, though both women were special to her in different ways. Yet, both of them had sparked a rare feeling her hearts. 

“2005. Tell you what. I bet you're going to have a really great year.”

“Yeah? See you.” And Rose ran _—_ back inside to a family of her own, blissfully unaware of where her life would take her. 

The Doctor had a bit more of an idea as to why she was there now. She was telling herself something, and she might have just figured it out. 

Don’t wait until it’s too late.

* * *

When the Doctor opened the TARDIS doors expecting Sheffield, instead hearing a breeze that sang, she slammed them shut, turning around to point at the crystal pillar in the middle of the console. 

“Now this is just cruel. I  _ chose  _ to go see the other two I did  _ not  _ choose this. Take me to Sheffield please.” she said with a huff, pulling a lever down only for her ship to do nothing. “Oh, come on!”

The TARDIS whirred in protest, her stubborn streak making itself known to the Doctor. 

“Great… I was barely ready for this the first time round, let alone a second.” A hand rested on the door handle, but she turned before leaving. “We are having  _ words  _ when I get back.”

The Doctor stepped out onto the balcony, aware of the risks of once again being in the same place as her past self. She looked out at the singing towers, the melodic wind easing her initial anxieties until she overheard a voice that had her chest warming and hearts hammering. 

“Ok. I’ll see you in a bit, sweetie.”

The Doctor found herself hiding behind a pillar as heels clicked along the pathway, breath hitching when she peeked around the pillar to catch sight of wild blonde curls and a stunning gold dress that sparkled in the warm lights surrounding the balcony. The back of the Doctor’s head hit the pillar with a quiet thud, eyes screwed shut as she took a deep breath, “Gods help me.” 

She pushed herself away from the cool marble, coat swishing in the breeze as she took enough steps forward to grip the edge of the balcony, settling herself next to River who offered her a friendly smile, one that the Doctor quickly returned. 

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” River spoke quietly, and how the Doctor had missed her voice, her perfume which caught on the breeze _—_ her everything. 

“It really is.” the Doctor replied, though she wasn’t looking at the towers.

River could feel her gaze, their eyes catching as she frowned. “I’m here with my husband.” she chastised, though that didn’t stop her gaze from wandering.

“Oh, I know.” the Doctor smiled, a hint of sadness to it as she struggled to keep her composure, seeing River again was  _ a lot _ to handle. She was supposed to be mad at the TARDIS, but right now she could kiss her, as well as the woman in front of her.

“You do?” River’s manicured brow raised in intrigue, “And how’s that?”

“Because…” the Doctor sighed,  _ now or never, _ “Because I remember every single second of being here with you _—_ sweetie.” 

River stiffened then, her whole body tensing as her eyes widened, jaw slack, her gaze once again running over the Doctor’s form. “Doctor..?”

The Doctor nodded, a wistful smile on her lips as River reached out, clasping the Doctor’s warm palm in her own as she let out a gasp. 

“It really is you, isn’t it?”

“It is, River.”

“I think I’ve just found my new favourite body of yours.” River replied with a cheeky grin, a watery laugh escaping the Doctor’s lips. “I’m also assuming this is regeneration is after him.” River deduced as she nodded behind her, the Doctor’s laugh quickly fading, her gaze dropping.

“Yes.” 

“And you haven’t seen me since our time on Darillium, have you?”

There was a pause that stretched out for too long to allow comfort. “No.”

River nodded, running her lips through her teeth as she glanced out at the towers. “Right.”

“River–”

“Why are you here, Doctor?”

The Doctor’s mouth clamped shut as she considered her answer, sighing heavily before she did. “The TARDIS brought me here, I don’t know why.”

“You’re lying.” River frowned, reading her wife’s expression far too easily.

“No I’m–”

“Yes, you are. Don’t forget how well I know that face. Some things don’t change.”

The Doctor pulled her hand away, resting her forearms on the balcony as she looked out at the view. She could see River do the same out of the corner of her eye. “She brought me here because… because,” the Doctor groaned, words catching on her tongue and twisting awkwardly around her mind as she tried to form the right sentence. “Because there’s _—_ no.” the Doctor shook her head. “I’m having–”

“There’s someone new.” River stated, her tone soft, but neutral. There was no malice or jealousy, just a simple smile and kind eyes when the Doctor chanced a glance her way.

“Sort of,” she sighed, looking down, “It’s _—_ I don’t know. I haven’t said anything. I’m too scared, and I think the TARDIS brought here to show me I shouldn’t be.”

“And I think she’s right.” 

“River–”

“Look, Doctor. I told you before, that I’ve heard the stories about us, and I know you won’t tell me whether it’s true _—_ but if it is–”

“ _ River–” _

“ _ If _ it is…” River pushed, her voice shaking a touch, “Then it’s ok. To… to move on. I want nothing more than for you to be happy, love.” River took a step forward, cupping the Doctor’s cheek and bringing their gazes together. “Ok?”

The Doctor just stared, a lump forming in her throat as she wilted under River’s intense stare. Her voice was lost for a moment, choosing instead to just nod until she could finally form a quiet. “Ok,” in return.

River’s hand curled around the back of the Doctor’s neck, pulling her forward until their lips ghosted over each other, the Doctor finally closing the gap when the space between them that was so small felt huge, her hands coming up to cup River’s cheeks desperately, a lone tear escaping her eye. The pad of her thumb stroked over River’s cheekbone as their mouths moved against each other so tenderly that the Doctor could feel her hearts crumble in her chest, River’s grip tightening on her coat when the Doctor’s tongue slipped passed her lips with a soft hum. 

When they finally pulled back, River in need of air, their foreheads stay pressed to one another’s as the Doctor’s hands remained cupping her cheeks. River caught sight of the tear track shining on the Doctor’s cheek and the watery gaze that glistened in the lights of Darillium, her heart sinking. “Oh, sweetie.” she cooed, leaning forward to press a gentle kiss to the corner of the Doctor’s lips, “You know I’ll always be out there somewhere, and I will always  _ always  _ love you.” River finished, dipping forward again to catch her wife’s lips a final time, the gesture so delicate, so soft, that the Doctor nearly sobbed against her. She mumbled something in return against River’s lips, so quiet that no one else in the universe would hear, none of her previous selves having to dared to admit it out loud before, but what she spoke sent tears leaking from River’s eyes as watery laugh sounded from her own lips until it was silenced by the Doctor’s mouth against her own. 

After saying her final goodbye to River, the Doctor slowly shut the doors of the TARDIS behind her, slumping against it with a resigned sigh, her ship blanketing her in a comforting warmth as more tears spilled from her eyes. 

With a final sniff, the Doctor’s hand clasped over the dematerialisation lever, ready for the next trip. “Right, Sheffield this time yeah?” she almost begged the TARDIS, unsure of how much more emotional turmoil she could take for one day. The TARDIS sounded an affirming beep which had the tightness in the Doctor’s chest easing as she yanked the lever down.

* * *

The TARDIS was kind enough to drop the Doctor exactly where she needed to be _—_ Sheffield Christmas market. She stepped out into a light flurry of snow, quickly making her way through the crowd in search of a certain someone, the Doctor knew she would be here, it’s why the TARDIS had dropped her off at this location. 

It didn’t take her long, flitting through the crowd as her coat and scarf caught on the wind. She heard Najia first, spotting Yaz second.

“Shall we find somewhere to sit?” Najia asked her daughter as she looked around at the benches surrounding them until her gaze caught the Doctor’s, eyes widening in surprise. 

“There’s quite a few free around the other side!” the Doctor called out.

* * *

A gentle snowfall patted down on the bustling Christmas market as Yaz and Najia wandered their way between the stalls, hot fruit punch warming their hands.

They idley chatted away as they weaved between the crowd, Christmas music filtering through the background wherever they went. Snowflakes caught in both the women’s dark hair, though Yaz’s was partially concealed by a beanie, soft curls cascading over her shoulders as she pulled her fluffy coat tighter around her.

It was nice to spend some time with her mum, her last trip with the Doctor lasting well over a month, the younger woman actually missing her family.

“Oh, Yaz, look at this.” Najia spoke, eyes settling on a glass ornament shaped like an elephant. “Isn’t it gorgeous?” 

“Yeah it’s lovely, would look good on the shelf wouldn’t it?” 

“It would. Shame it’s a bit out of my price range.” Najia replied despondently.

Yaz picked up the tag that read  _ £80 _ , quickly dropping it to follow her mum back into the crowd. They carried on walking until they found themselves near the huge Christmas tree at the edge of the market that was lit up with a rainbow of colours, the star on top gleaming like a beacon, beckoning them closer. 

“Shall we find somewhere to sit?” Najia suggested, looking around at the abundance of benches, plenty of them already full.

“There’s quite a few free around the other side!” A voice called from behind Yaz, so bubbly and so northern there was no one else it could be but the–

“Doctor!” Najia called out, a kind smile on her lips as she greeted Yaz’s friend.

“Hiya Najia! Hi Yaz!” She grinned, already standing herself in Yaz’s immediate proximity.

“Doctor, what’re you doing here?” Yaz asked. She was surprised to see her friend, but happy nonetheless, any time spent with the Doctor was a joy.

“Oh, you know, just browsing.” She stated, gesturing to the market with far too much enthusiasm and making Yaz suspicious.

“Browsing?” Yaz interrogated.

“Yep.”

“What for?”

“Stuff.”

“What sort of stuff?” Yaz’s eyebrow raised in question.

“Stuffy — stuff.” the Doctor replied, her face cringing as much as she was internally at her terrible response.

“Doctor, seriously, what’s–” 

“Oh, hot chocolate!” the Doctor interrupted, distractedly pointing to a stall a few feet away and inwardly cursing Yaz for being able to read her nearly as well as her wife. “You grab us a seat and I’ll be back in a tick.” she headed toward the stand in search of the warm beverage, hoping it would give her enough time to gather her thoughts and stop herself from being over eager. It was a bad habit, acting over enthusiastic to hide her sadness, and clearly Yaz had caught onto the habit pretty quickly. 

Back at the table, Yaz’s eyes followed the Doctor as her friend waited in the queue, mother and daughter now sat down at a bench as they waited for her.

“So what’s the Doctor doing for Christmas then?” Najia asked, the question peeling Yaz’s gaze away from the woman of interest. 

“Oh, um, I’m not sure. She’s not really got any family so I really don’t know.” 

“She’s got no family?” Najia spoke disheartened as her features softened, quickly glancing over to the Doctor who was currently agreeing to have marshmallows sprinkled on top of her drink. “Gosh, you wouldn't think it, she always seems so–”

“Happy?” Yaz finished for her, Najia nodding her head in agreement.

“Yeah…” Najia trailed off, thinking for a moment as she took as sip of her punch. “So she’s not doing anything? She’s going to spend christmas on her own?”

“Well–”

“Doctor?” Najia suddenly called out as the Doctor made her way back, stepping unceremoniously over the bench seat and carefully placing her hot chocolate on the table as she sat down.

“Yes?”

“What are you doing for Christmas?”

The Doctor paused in taking a sip of her drink, “Oh, well, I guess I hadn’t really thought about it. Haven’t been the biggest fan of Christmas in recent years, not sure how I’ll feel about it this time around, why?”

“Do you want to spend it with us?” Najia asked, her voice gentle and smile kind and the Doctor’s current fragility almost made her shatter into a million pieces at the offer. 

“I–”

“I’d really like it if you did.” Yaz affirmed, her hand reaching over the table to link her fingers with the Doctor’s own. “I don’t want you to be alone through the holidays.” she smiled with sincerity, her heart warming at the Doctor’s returning smile and tightening grip. 

“Are you sure?” the Doctor worried her bottom lip between her teeth. “I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“Not at all.” Najia insisted, “You’re more than welcome to come, Doctor.”

The Doctor’s eyes shined for a moment with what Yaz was pretty sure were tears, though a hard blink meant they were gone a moment later, “Then yes. I would love to.” the Doctor said with earnest. “Thank you, Najia.” 

“It’ll be our pleasure to have you.”

* * *

It certainly was, it seemed, when the Doctor walked into the Khan’s flat a couple days later, ushered inside by a Christmas jumper clad Hakim and Christmas music blasting down the hallway. 

“The Doctor’s here!” he called out into the welcoming home, Yaz instantly making her way down the hall toward the Doctor at her dad’s announcement. 

“Merry Christmas Doctor!” Yaz said as she pulled the Doctor into a hug that the Time Lord happily accepted. 

“Merry Christmas Yaz! Though I have to admit I wasn’t expecting it to be  _ so  _ Christmassy in here.”

“Yeah, well, as kids me and Sonya begged mum and dad enough to do Christmas because all our friends spoke about it at school and we felt like we were missing out. It kind of all just stuck since then. Though we don’t usually do the proper Christmas dinner, ours is a bit more Indian than a turkey roast,” she explained excitedly. 

“Sounds brilliant.” the Doctor grinned back, gaze quickly softening as she took Yaz in properly. She was wearing a red high neck jumper and black skinny jeans, fluffy socks covering her feet. Her hair fell over her shoulders in natural curls and she was wearing a little more make up than usual, made obvious by cherry painted lips. “You look lovely, Yaz.” 

Yaz’s cheeks flushed at the complement as her gaze briefly dropped to the floor before she cleared her throat and looked back up. “So do you, Doctor.” she returned, though her friend was dressed the same as always, the only difference being that her rainbow patterned top was knitted rather than the usual fabric of her t-shirts. 

“Thanks, Yaz.” the Doctor smiled bashfully, both women locked in each other’s gaze until Sonya’s voice rudely interrupted them.

“Come on you two, are you gonna stand there all day or are we  _ actually  _ gonna open presents?” Yaz couldn’t see her, but she could practically hear her sisters smug expression. 

Yaz rolled her eyes as she turned, the Doctor chuckling lightly behind her. “We’re coming!” 

The Doctor watched as gifts were exchanged between the family, eventually handing out her own with a glee that buzzed through her whole body. She got Hakim a tie that lit up that he thought was brilliant, though from Najia’s eye roll it seemed not everyone was as thrilled. Yaz had told her to get certain make up for Sonya which she had successfully done if the rare and genuine smile from the younger sister was anything to go by.

It was Yaz’s turn after that, who opened a small box and pulled out a necklace with a small crystal on the end. It was the same colour as the ones in the TARDIS and younger woman didn’t doubt it was hand made by the machine itself as she slipped it round her neck. She gave the Doctor another tight hug and a thank you whispered in her ear from where they sat together on the sofa. The Doctor’s final gift was for Najia that she offered with a thank you for having her, and when she opened the box she let out a gasp, pulling out the cut glass elephant she’d spotted at the Christmas market. “But Doctor this was–”

“Don’t worry about the price Najia, happiness costs nothing.” she grinned.

“Doctor, I don’t know what to say. You really didn’t have to.”

“But I wanted to, as a thank you for today, and in general for being a lovely human. And making a very  _ very  _ awesome human in Yaz.” she nodded confidently as she slung an arm around Yaz’s shoulder and pulled her close, keeping it in place even as Sonya fake retched.

“That’s so soppy.”

“Sonya, shush!” Najia chided before sending smile in the Doctor’s direction. 

“Now, Yaz, give the Doctor her present will you?” she said, trying and failing to secretly wipe at her eyes. 

The Doctor’s eyes widened in surprise as Yaz pushed a present into her lap with a small smile, hazel-green orbs glancing around the room to find all eyes on her. 

“Go on,” Yaz insisted quietly, “Open it.”

“Yaz you shouldn’t have–” 

“Doctor, did you really think you were gonna come here for Christmas and  _ not  _ get a present?”

The Doctor’s face scrunched up, “Well,”

“Don’t be daft,” Yaz laughed as she batted her friends arm. “Now open your present.” 

Without another moment to spare, the Doctor ripped open the snowman covered paper to reveal a pair of fingerless rainbow gloves, a rainbow striped beanie and a pair of rainbow fluffy socks to match Yaz’s. She gasped as her smile beamed, pulling the hat from the paper and immediately sticking it on her head. “Brilliant!” she cried out as she looked around the room at all the faces smiling back at her. “Oh, thank you so much everyone these are amazing!” 

“Told you she’d like them.” Yaz smirked at mum who laughed in response. 

Yaz leaned in to loudly whisper in the Doctor’s ear, “My mum thought all the rainbow was overkill.”

“No way! Rainbows are ace. I love rainbows,” she affirmed, still smiling, her jaw starting to ache but the Doctor didn’t care.

“Yeah, I wonder why.” Sonya mumbled under her breath, yelping when Yaz knocked her with her foot.

Yaz sat on the sofa watching a cheesy Christmas movie while her parents cooked, her sister sat at the kitchen table on her phone, only looking up when the Doctor bounded back into the room to plonk herself next to Yaz, sinking into the cushions as she cosied up to her friend. “What you think?” she grinned, lifting her foot and wriggling her toes in her brand new rainbow socks.

“I think we match,” Yaz quipped, lifting her foot up to her hover next to the Doctor’s. 

“We do! That’s ace!” 

Both women laughed as they lowered their feet back to the ground, snuggling further into the sofa and not leaving an inch of space between them. The Doctor glanced over at Yaz whose focus was back on the TV, though she seemed to be concentrating on it a little too hard. Her mind raced through the previous few days, her visits to her friends, her wife, and so the Doctor swallowed her nerve, speaking in a hushed whisper. “You know, Yaz I–”

“Food’s ready!” Hakim called out, breaking whatever tension was beginning to brew between the two women, their faces millimetres from each other. They were up off the sofa like a shot, both flushed as they made their way over to the table. 

* * *

Once their bellies were full with good food and they’d laughed at the Doctor’s many ridiculous stories around the table, the Doctor and Yaz wrapped themselves up warm to head outside, the Time Lord dressed in her brand new hat, gloves and socks _—_ her rainbow scarf already twisted around her neck.

“We won’t be back too late mum!” Yaz called out as she unlocked the door. 

“Ok, wish Ryan and Graham a Merry Christmas from me!” 

“Will do!” 

By the time they arrived at Graham’s, the two women were dusted with snow, the flurry yet to have relented on Sheffield, the snow melting off their boots as soon as they stepped inside the warm home. 

“Merry Christmas Yaz! Merry Christmas Doc!” Graham pulled them both into a hug as Ryan came down the stairs and quickly joined in.

“Merry Christmas, you two.” 

Christmas music played quietly in the background of the house, the smell of turkey dinner still lingering as Ryan continued to pick at leftovers, a pigs in blanket half stuffed in his mouth when he came out of the kitchen after fetching another beer.

“Ryan, stop picking,” Graham complained with a roll of his eyes.

“What? I’m still hungry.”

“You could eat for England I swear.”

Ryan just grinned in reply as he knelt down to pull presents from underneath the tree. 

After gifts were exchanged, the Doctor’s chest had never felt warmer. For the first time in a long time she felt content with her new family, though the curse of alien invasions on Christmas always had her prepared in the back of her mind. 

They ended up stopping at Graham’s a lot longer than anticipated before heading back to Yaz’s. They all hugged each other goodbye with the promise of seeing each other the next day, but as Yaz and the Doctor both stood in the doorway, Ryan called out to them.

“Oh, look at what’s above you! Funny that.” he grinned cheekily, and Yaz looked up to spot mistletoe hanging above her head. 

“Well, you both know the tradition.” Graham said, eyebrows raising, clearly in on Ryan’s plan.

“Ryan–” 

“You’re right, I do know this one Graham.” the Doctor stated as she remembered what River had said.

‘ _ It’s ok. To… to move on. I want nothing more than for you to be happy, love.’ _

Using her chance, the Doctor leaned down, and even though she chickened out at the last second, she still managed to plant a kiss on Yaz’s cheek, just shy of full lips. The younger woman froze, a blush painting her cheeks as she stammered for something to say, Ryan hiding a laugh behind his hand. The mixed reactions however had the Doctor concerned. “That  _ was  _ the right tradition? Right? I didn’t get it mixed up?”

“No that was the right one, Doc.” Graham smirked.

“Oh good, I was just worried because–”

“Come on, let’s go!” Yaz blurted out, grabbing the Doctor’s hand and tugging her out the door. “My mum will be wondering where we are.” 

The walk back consisted of the Doctor filling what would’ve been an awkward silence if it wasn’t for her chattering, though her over enthusiastic conversation stemmed from the worry she’d done something wrong. Yaz’s parents didn’t notice a difference however when they arrived back at the flat, food spread out on the table that neither woman could touch, both too full from having dinner at Graham’s. 

They spent the rest of the evening watching Christmas television, Yaz and the Doctor pressed together on the sofa at the Doctor’s insistence, Yaz’s heart pounding in her chest the whole time. The Doctor fidgeted the whole evening, nervous energy filtering through her as her hand ached to reach out for Yaz’s own, instead locking her own together and holding them in her lap. 

It was late when everyone decided to head to bed, the Doctor borrowing a pair of Yaz’s pyjamas to sleep in, though she doubted she would be doing anything of the sort.

Quiet engulfed Yaz’s room as the younger woman got ready for bed, wiping away her make up as the Doctor perched awkwardly on the edge of Yaz’s bed. Fairy lights were the only thing that lit up the bedroom, the warm glowing reflecting on Yaz’s profile and making her eyes shine, dark brown hues enhanced by the lights. All the Doctor could do was stare in awe until Yaz felt her gaze, slowly turning her head to face the Doctor whose gaze quickly dropped, her hands in her lap suddenly the most interesting thing in the room. 

Eyes glancing over the Doctor looking far too adorable in her pyjamas Yaz audibly gulped, taking a deep breath before speaking, “By the way _—_ you know earlier? You missed.”

“Huh?” the Doctor looked up, confusion written across her features.

“You missed.”

“What do you mean I missed?”

Yaz stood from her desk chair, moving to sit on her bed next to the Doctor, “When you kissed me. You missed.”

“Oh…” the Doctor’s gaze dropped to Yaz’s lips, “You mean–”

“Yes.” Yaz whispered. “Doctor?”

“Hmm?”

“Kiss me? Properly, this time.”

“Properly?” the Doctor’s hands came up to rest on Yaz’s cheeks.

“Yeah, properly,” Yaz uttered.

The Doctor leaned forward then, lips grazing Yaz’s as their noses nudged each other, her mind thinking of River one last time before she was consumed by everything Yasmin Khan. Their lips brushed together, pressing together firmly after a moment, Yaz humming in delight as her hands moved to curl around the Doctor’s neck. Their mouths moved languidly against each other, the Doctor’s tongue running along Yaz’s lower lip seeking entrance and licking into younger woman’s mouth once she pushed past full lips. She kissed Yaz slow and deep, pent up feelings bursting through like fireworks on New Year’s, a similar feeling erupting in her chest. 

When their lips parted, both women were breathless, hot air hitting each other’s lips as they giggled like drunk teenagers at a party. 

“Merry Christmas, Doctor.” Yaz murmured against the Doctor’s lips as she leaned back in.

“Merry Christmas, Yaz.”

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments are greatly appreciated!! 
> 
> and once again, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!


End file.
